"If fears what makes us decide,
Our future journey,
I'm not along for the ride,
Cuz I'm still yearning,
To try and touch the sun,
My fingers burning,
Before you're old you are young,
Yeah I'm still learning
I am falling down,
Try and stop me,
It feels so good to hit the ground,
You can watch me,
Fall right on my face,
It's an uphill human race,
and I am falling down
I'm standing out in the street,
The earth is moving,
I feel it under my feet,
And I'm still proving,
That I can stand my ground..." -"Falling Down" -Avril Lavigne
I fell down today.
I keep forgetting that my leg’s got a hole in it
Meds make it feel like nothing and I forget.
Numbs all the feeling…
He’s hurtin and don’t want me to know---
Got Soul girl out of Gui but her mind’s still there.
Wrapped in layers of fear, self-loathing, and confusion.
Like trying to put stained glass back together,
the pieces never line up again,
And you cut your hands a lot.
Like with Doy---
It’ll come together again.
Never the same,
But some how ---
--- more beautiful than before.
I killed more people.
Eight Dead, Twelve injured.
Eight futures gone, Eight hearts stopped
Eight familes gonna cry and ask why?
What would I say?
Eight then, Eight now.
Total of 16 people.
16... That's a bad number, Obachan said so.
4, 4 times, twice the number of death.
--- didn’t hear me?
--- didn’t care what I said?
--- forgot what I said?
My fault, I was responsible for her.
I’m the worst big sister ever, I let her down.
Those people died cause I let Persi down
I need to make that right but I can’t figure out how.
Should ask Doy, maybe he knows.
Went into the black and found monsters.
And lost souls, wandering the black with no home.
I saw them and some part of me hoped I wasn’t seeing our future.
Is that where you go when everyone forgets you?
On Bey and things havn’t quieted down.
Mila left the ship and disappeared.. went back to Athens?
Shame is beside herself, with worry and thoughts of the worst.
I visited Maggie again, just to let her know she’s still missed.
Was a nice day, blue sky and high clouds.
The wind blew nice and easy.
Then I fell down.
Cause there’s a mole---
"And I don't wanna fall to pieces
I just want to sit and stare at you
I don't want to talk about it
And I don't want a conversation
I just want to cry in front of you
I don't want to talk about it..." "Fall to Pieces" - Avril Lavigne